Sunday, October 4, 2009

Desperately Seeking Something

Desperately Seeking Something asks:

I was invited to a Halloween party and can not think of anything to wear! I don't want to look like a dork and just throw on a white sheet. What do you suggest?


My mom always said "be yourself." Okay, YOUR mom probably said that, my mom just said, "conform, conform or everyone will hate you." Anyway, assuming your mom told you to be yourself, why not do that?

And you could just be yourself... but in corpse form. Make yourself look like you've recently been murdered. In order to make this realistic, why not ask a friend to stab you repeatedly in the kidney? You would then be naturally drained of color and not have to wear white face paint. Once you get to the party, feel free to lie down on the floor and let the blood pool. If someone asks if you're okay, don't respond. You can't go out of character.

You'll be the life of the party! You're welcome!

Miss Advice

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